Tonight I told "my girls" (the girls who live in the cottage I work in at Grace Children's Home) about my plans to go to Romania. This meaning I will be leaving my position here at GCH and stepping out of my role as their care-worker/house parent. This was probably the single most difficult part of my decision to go to Romania. It is so difficult to step away from a ministry that involves living int he same house and walking through life with these girls who I love so much! I was incredibly torn over telling the girls; I didn't want them to be upset, but I also knew I would be disappointed in myself if my presence in their lives wasn't making enough of an impact that they are affected by my leaving. I of course, over-analyzed the situation, which I should have trusted God more with, rather than worrying over.
In the end there was a mixture of reactions. One girl who knew of my heart for Romania was excited for me, while lamenting my leaving. Another girl began crying and hugged me. Of course there was also the one who was "pretend" upset and pretended to be angry and hurt that I was leaving. The most quiet girl in the house simply responded, "At least you're doing something you've wanted to do for so long." Wow, could I have been more blessed by their reactions, and the group hug that followed!?!?
I'm reminded of the truth of Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Maybe someday I will learn to follow the command not to be anxious, but that day wasn't today. Yet, my God is faithful and answered my prayers and the prayers of the few people I quickly texted seeking their prayers. I am so incredibly blessed with friends & family who I can count on to pray for me at the drop of a...text :)
My petition for God's comfort and peace to reign in this cottage will not end. I will continue to struggle thru my transition from my ministry here to a new and largely unknown ministry in Romania. But I know that my God is faithful and I will continue praising Him with thanksgiving for the ways He continually works in my life and blesses me beyond measure!!!
This evening ended with one of my girls and I practicing a song we are going to sing at church together in a couple weeks. The song is a revamped version of "This little light of mine" by Addison Road. and as I sang with her I was reminded of another verse in Philippians. "Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe." Phil. 2:14-15 I know on my own strength I will never achieve the righteousness outlined in those verses, but the power of the Holy Spirit is boundless and I pray that my light may shine brighter and brighter until the day of Christ!
My hope: to never stop thanking God that He would choose to shine through me!
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